Wednesday, November 26, 2008

12 Steps on How To Keep The Relationship Alive

3:20 PM by Lilian ·
Do you feel your relationship is not what it used to be? The initial magic and the same spirit is lacking or gone? Start re-evaluating your relationship before its too late. Here are the 12 steps below i gathered to help me and you keeping our relationship alive and kicking.

1. Have a date night- Married or not you both have lives outside of the relationship and making one day a week all about you and your sweetie will make it even more special. As they say, "absences makes the heart grow fonder" A bonus will also be how much fun you have with one another.

2. Write a love letter- let your girlfriend or boyfriend know how much you love them. It does not have to 4 pages long and it can even be a poem. Just let them know once in a while that they are someone truly special in your life.

3. Good sex- Sex is not important especially if you are just starting out but it does help. Being in touch with one another's feelings in the bedroom can go a long way. Use scented candles or soothing music to get the mood started. When you are having sex don't make it about yourself getting satisfied but about the both of you getting an orgasm.

4. Fight-Yes that's right have an argument. I believe nothing is more boring than a couple who says they never fight. That is just an out right lie. Every couple argues and there is no shame in it. It only becomes unhealthy when names called and fists are being thrown. Those things are never acceptable. Fights help you find out how the other feels about certain topics like family and boundaries.

5. Respect- Without respect there is no relationship. Everyone no mater who they are or what they have done deserves respect. To be treated as an equal and nothing less.

6. Have common interest- this is not a major thing but it does help in a relationship to have something that both of you are interested in like, biking and writing. To also have a common interest in making the relationship last.

7. Open Communication- it is almost like fighting but different. Communication needs to be an everyday occurrence for the relationship to last. You both need to know how the other one is feeling and what is going on in the relationship. To keep the other informed that you are indeed happy and that there is no reason for them to fear that you will stray.

8. Loyalty and Faithfulness-I do not care what any one says this is needed for a relationship to work. Everyone deserves to have someone who is there for them and only them. It's only moral and in today's world the healthy thing to do. I have heard the arguments that animals have more than one partner but last time I checked I walked on two legs and not four. I don't have a feathers and wings. I do talk coherently with words and sentences. A relationship that is meant to be will be easy for you to stay faithful and no need to go to another person. Put your heart and soul into the relationship if by chance it doesn't work, you can't say you didn't try.

9. Know when to forgive- that hey may come a time that you will have to decide when to forgive. If by chance your love one does go to another, you need to re-evaluate what you cared most about them. Or maybe they talked to an ex more times than necessary. You have to decide can you forgive and move on or do you have to let them go. If you do decide to forgive as hard as it may be you have to keep it in the past. Let them show you that they are truly sorry.

10. Call each other- If you are just starting out or you have been dating awhile call the other one to find out how they day went. This shows that you are interested in what happens to them when you are away. It also shows how much you missed being with them and hearing their voice. You maybe surprised at how long the conversation last just by saying I miss you or how you doing today?

11. Take it slow- Don't rush into anything you might regret later. Take the time to know each other. Let it flow naturally just by taking it one day at a time. Especially with sex, take your time before going to bed with the person; it just might save a whole lot of drama that the relationship is not ready to handle.

12. Last but not least TRUST! - Without trust there is no relationship. Do not assume the worst of your partner. Let the relationship take its course. Only be untrusting when it is warranted.

There are more ways to keep relationship alive but these are the basics that we often neglected.


Anonymous said...
November 29, 2008 at 12:01 AM

Excellent advice! We need to keep those relationships happy and healthy for the sake of the kids. A home with both parents is much better than single moms and dads.
This should be required reading for all couples. Claire from Oooh Baby Baby Parenting and Environmental Issues

Anonymous said...
November 29, 2008 at 5:23 AM

Very good article! It's the kind of article I gave my clients in my counseling practice. Clear, concise, and with sound information they can use.

joel said...
November 29, 2008 at 7:53 AM

Write a love letter- let your girlfriend or boyfriend know how much you love them. It does not have to 4 pages long and it can even be a poem. Just let them know once in a while that they are someone truly special in your life.

Ill bookmark this one....

Anonymous said...
November 30, 2008 at 2:42 AM

A very constructive article.

Its nice to see these articles popping up and I hope it benefits people.

Anonymous said...
December 3, 2008 at 4:02 PM

Thx. for such cool tips :)

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